Dealing With My Depression

      I have been experiencing depression for quite some time. And as I look inside my self, I realize that the depression that is existing deep within is coming from a mixed feeling of helplessness, the desire to call out for help and the feeling that there are no solutions nor streaks of hope for what I am currently bearing on my shoulders. 

Depression is a deep struggle to hope and stay afloat.

     As I encounter a feeling of helplessness deep within, I slowly start to grasp the point that my finite amount of enthusiasm and anticipation is way below the critical level. This factor kills. The thoughts of sharing my feelings to my friends is a remote source of comfort and the idea of seeking help from someone else who is more competent offers no solace as well. As I look into this experience, isolation becomes my deadly nemesis that creeps deep within. It is like stretching out your hand to hold on to something that is seemingly is only a hologram of hope...which makes it more painful--realizing that all you have come to believe as lifelines are simple empty sacks filled with nothing but air and frustration.

     Deep within, despite the fact that I am an intellectual, nothing holds firm to a heart that is living with the termites of despair and emptiness. Lest a deeper spirit of love find its way into my mainstream consciousness, depression will still continue to loom.